Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
