My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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