Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
