in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
