i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
And then my night got REAL pukey
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
