i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
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