you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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