Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
