A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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