i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
