I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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