so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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