the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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