well you can't waste a boner
Farmville is her only friend.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
