I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
We talked him into tasing himself.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
