So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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