...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I'm always down for nudity.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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