Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize