fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
