Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
