Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
