I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
