I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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