I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
