awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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