in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
he fucked my hip out of place.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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