I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
