im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
