office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize
