i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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