Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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