his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Randomize
