You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
