This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
