Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
