you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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