...so i touched it.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize
