I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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