***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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