See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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