i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
