Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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