I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
