i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
