my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
