he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
My vagina is very pro this idea
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize