so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
