Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I have fence marks all over my body
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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