the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
