Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
